Wednesday, June 15, 2022

Land of the Self-Erasing Word (brief ancient history)

In the Flooded Woods of Midrandir south of The Shadewood, south of the current capital's border, sleeps a dead kingdom older, truer, more dimensional, rooted deeper into the landscape, understanding better the magic of existence.

 

It was one of those electrically blue days when the tallest mountain cracked, it's spine breaking under the pressure of its inhabitants, the deep unseen weight of sorceries. Time did not seem to pass as much as much as build, slowly gathering weight. The sky seemed to drip silver. Those were the last days of an empire. A late summer with gray ladies nearly dead to all the poetry written in their names, sunlight trying to penetrate through the fog.

A population of thunderers and hags. Were-elves streaking in and out of forests at night to leave subversive handbill at door and window. They dragged through wet streets speaking in languages older than the stones of cities buried in sand. They began to feel they're sinking into history, as if the dead really do persist. They remembered a land where you could somehow walk, and not need the Waygates, and bones still could rest in peace, nourishing ghosts of dandelions, no one to plow them up. The gods had to intervene. Dozens of birds swarmed around a woman, all her loses made a blessing in her hand. This was Sabra. An angel descended from an electrically blue sky. Any truth their life possessed was buried in this central rock. Their one escape, a dreamless sleep. The Hollow Pillar.


Before that, rain poured in the abstract garden. White nightmares voiced on the floor below. Rain in the boots of the people in Nureck. Rain on the nameless moor. It was a late summer.

In stillness they sought a form of self-defense. Even then they began to dream a return to great palaces, the great jaded hulks, boarded up but still standing, as far as anyone knew, in this city, always on the edge of comatose slums. A beggar revealed himself to be a saint, Legin of Lechsea.

It was a land policed by the Emperor’s linguists, by technicians in death-system control, disease consultants, profiteers of the fetus industry. "The seventh floor wants you to read it and sign it", "You're free to be nothing", "Music is the final hypnotic" these are all things they whispered in his royal ear.


The saint wondered whether he'd need a new following or whether the old would simply rearrange itself to accommodate his second coming. Either way he'd be the epoch's barren hero. He seemed impatient with the world for not knowing the things he knew. 


The old age of youth, a rising belief in death-in-life, there was too much gravity in the universe. Whatever horror was ultimate subsumed into an even more immobile category, paranoia.

the blindmaidens naked on styrofoam pedestals, the sellers of ancient medicines, the masters of trance, the black stoics exhibiting their puncture marks, the knifemen and poisoners, every head melting in the wrap of The Sound. Mystics in heat, translucent boys fondling the tits of missionaries' wives. They pressed against each other, chained to their invisible history, the youngest among them knowing of all needs that one is upper-most, the need to be illiterate in the land of the self-erasing word.


The Emperor, usually located somewhere on the outskirts of a vast population center, sat on the bed or floor, never in chairs, sucking up bad hash, waiting for the ever-rumored to come slipping in out of the glades in a comically elegant carriage into which seven or eight bodies might eventually drop, musicians, long blond girls with perfect legs, most in soiled old clothes and mauled boots.

There was a remote secret, something one might seek to reach only through the unbent energies of certain drugs. A puppet drug of technology, made and marketed under supervision, a contingency weapon devised by City paranoiacs seeking geometries deeper than we know of, their voices uttering secrets we are never told.

The Emperor became both frightened and totally immobile, distrustful of everyone in the room, growing heavier by the second. He tried to reason his way out of this conjuncture of fear and stone-weight.


His last words were not spoken, only written on a discarded memorandum scroll:


You are hunter prophet

You are lion's paw

You are angel avenger

Come to my door

West the vanished mountains

East the barren fields

Shining bird

Sleeping long and deep

Dreamed pillar


Down the highlands

They're counting up the dead

Music playing in the highlands

To be younger than the ones you kill

And remain a velvet child

General and his lady

You have lost the war

I have lost the war


These words have become a famous poem recited by elves. Seers always find new meanings in it, for a thousand years now. It carries an almost religious state of existence.

The Fall Equinox came to these whole ashen plains. The wind blew so hard blood glazed on the sides of trees. All hope of waking lost, in the nightmare of the ashen plains.


Nature had become imbecilic here, forcing its pain to find a voice. There was never heard a sound so primal. It expressed the secret feculent menace of a forest or swamp. They could almost feel the sound under their feet. In the stillness it seemed extremely near, mossy flesh touching their ankles. The beauty and horror of wordless things. It began to snow late in the day of Equinox. It was real snow and it was falling now. Riders, wayfarers, snow emergency routes, salt spreaders, bridges and tunnels and ports. Snow was coming down the sky. It was falling on the city and on the countryside. Snowstorm.

Silence came in, sculptured by spoken dreams, by pain-voices, Lord of the Night's children. Praying to their master all over this frost and harrowed city. 


Autumn had only just began and the mornings were cold and dark. Lights dissolved in low fog, silent men clutched eyes in pain, apparitional in black slickers. Derelicts were everywhere, often too wasted or tired to beg. There was pure sound now, shrill wind, a voice from the evilest dreams. Sabra was trying to blink her way back to the realm of events, but her long druid's face rested, having slid into a shallow trance, fallen into the habit of simply listening to silence endowed with acoustical properties, Music of a dead universe.


In the house near Duindil where centuries pass like the empurpled clouds, there is moonlight on the river and great rotting towers arrayed across the night. They couldn't go out West to find privacy. There was no safe land left. They needed to build inwards, that was the only direction left to build. Building inwards. Those were the orders of Lord Iston Moonpearl, his slight diffident voice, never cresting, belonging to an alternate entity, a small man lodged in his chest cavity. Iston is waiting for the first line of light to appear across a tall tower window, experiencing a rare moment of solitude and whispering to the wind:


Being young restores the god that eats itself

Better than the feast that ends

When they pick us from their teeth

They will study us not by digging into the earth

But by climbing vast dunes of rubble and mutilated stone

Seeking to reach the tops of our buildings

Here they'll chip lovingly at our spires, mansards, turrets, flower pots, pigeon lofts and chimneys

Scaling our masonry they will find

The encrustations of art and culture, decade by decade


 There was a sound in the darkness outside, a sudden tumult over the city. The town more dead than alive. The sun is still below the horizon. The day feels like rain, but for now the air is uncommonly clear. Ice and sunlight turn the construction to electric-white lines of energy.

Creatures of fable spoke the words of sleepers, singly, coupled, in chorus. The rhythms made no waking sense. Lord Iston thought they were warning him ... visibly angry that he couldn't understand. Undreamed grammar floats in his spittle. Dispossessed elves run around up on the roof, gibbering, dancing on a Latin balcony. Their bodies lacquered, sprayed with the rarest of pressurized jellies. Iston's bride, Morwen, had a magic face, a face everyone knows. She stared at him from across the bedroom.


Past the cemeteries towards Anurin, tides of ash-light broke across the spires. It was clear the inhabitants became interested in endings, in how to survive a dead idea. Spending their evenings running around in little circles. The inhabitants led a scattered life. Probably some kind of astral madness. Their rooms yielded no secrets, it became obvious they were mourning, or whatever the elven equivalent of mourning is. They got stuck in new levels of madness every day. All over the country there was nothing but madness. Anurin was the sheer peak.


At the end, bearers of a weight that went beyond simple pounds and ounces, men and women single file, leaning into the wind, following mountain guides, traveled to some sort of center. They flooded the paths behind them, escaping their own homes in narrow and elegant warships, riding into the sunset like a sort of funeral for their empire.



d20 Random denizens of Mirandir (50% chance of being an ancient, thousand year old imperial elves. Otherwise usually a human)

1. Artist, specializes in taking a tiny stitich and ripping it wide, blinking (teleporting) while the blood flows.

2. 2d6 Marauders not eager to browse in this particular room, they feel displaced.

3. 2d4 Gaunt dogs picking in the rubble for scraps of food

4. Patron saint of all those who hear the river-whistles sing the mysteries and who return to sleep in wine by the south wheel of the city.

5. Traveler who lost his soul and only talks about traveling.

6. 2d6 Living effigies of sane men leading normal lives. 

7. A very snaky boy. Sheer snake. Heavy lidded reptile eyes.

8. Scientific genius of the underground. Elusive and crazy, wears disguises of various kinds.

9. 3d6 Barbarians with a quaint sense of theatre.

10. A tall laconic man with a scar.

11. A slow motion sprinter. a Quickling fey seeming to move in slow-motion.

12.  Diane, bad posture, smudged fingers, horrible posture. Her voice burns slightly. Literally causes things to go in smoke. Just slightly. Unless she shouts.

13. Mylon, folk singer from the West. Lean black man with strange eyes. Carrying a dead dog.

14. A convocation of 3d10 martyrs, divine kidneys, lungs aloft in smoke visible behind their skin. They are perishable but never ending.

15. Rat bastard

16. A leper planting trees.

17. The Anti-king and duplicate bishops of hallucination.

18. d4 Bloody oxen

19. d4 ladies in chiseled jade, panne velvet, attar of damask rose

20. 2d4 men trapped with the voice, vocal range of bats. They're something in-between.








Tuesday, May 24, 2022

Tables I need:

 Roll tables I need:

1. Weird gods and demigods generator: domains + descriptive word + what they oppose

2. What's in this scroll? (spells chart + potential side effects)

3. Extremely unusual monster abilities (This hobgoblin has a weird purple bulbous forehead that pops if he is hit with a certain amount of damage causing everyone within the bulb's gooey splash to start growing violet fungus on a random body part)

Thursday, January 6, 2022

d20 Curses

 This table is for an OSE Cleric sub-class I'm writing but it's generally useful.

1. Choose an another creature - the target’s fate is bound to them. The target takes damage whenever the bonded creature does, but if the target takes damage the other character is healed.

2. Vision is obscured by grey mists past 60-ft.

3. Sees everyone as gnomes.

4. Animals despise the target and attack on sight.

5. Views the world in monochrome, save for the occasional blood red object.

6. Unlucky. The target cannot benefit suffers a critical miss on a roll of 1-3.

7. Marked for death and cannot naturally heal.

8. Fire hates the target and will move in their direction, always trying to burn them. 

9. One of the target’s hands does all it can to inconvenience and harm them, i.e. dropping or breaking items, refusing to grip great weapons etc.

10. Any items the target holds feels incredibly cumbersome and heavy. Unless they have exceptional strength the target suffers -2 to attacking with any weapon larger than a dagger.

11. Every winter day there’s a 1 in 50 chance lightning will strike exactly where you stand.

12. Heart and body freeze every sixty seconds, making the person paralyzed for a round once every minute. 

13. Suffers double damage from wood. 

14. Suffers double damage from hollow objects. 

15. Loses the sense of touch. Becomes inaccurate and clumsier but resistant to cold damage. 

16. During winter must go into a long sleep, only awakening with the coming of spring. 

17. Movement is hindered as if underwater, while moving perfectly normal when actually underwater. 

18. Begins to cough the poison which will somehow certainly will be responsible to ending their bloodline. 

19. Can’t lift both feet off the air at the same time, meaning they can only walk but not run. It’s movement speed is limited to 20-ft per round. 

20. Can’t see the one who cursed them.

World Map

 I made this world map by using a custom filter on an image of paint on a palette.

Basically, The further away you move from Grey, the less directly medieval it becomes and more weird and fantastical.

So like, there are dragonborn mercenaries that fly in the carapace of a gigantic dead dragon, but not in Arendor. There it's more like, castles, duchies, goblins, farms, ghosts, knights.



Vradda, The Frostbitten Earth, is like a norse-saga type place with giants, pale elves, vikings and valkyrie war-maidens. A snowy wasteland of harsh warriors. The edge of the world, the realm of old-blood, ancient beasts and sorceries from before the rise of mankind. HEAVY FUCKING METAL. "And the wolf howled unbroken for eight moons, those who listened to his music knew: The wolf was the first to sense the coming of the great end, or the beginning of it."

The Gloaming MegaCastle is like a castlevania castle on an island that keeps expanding towards the mainland. dark creatures spill forth from there. The Dwarves have many legends about who rules it.

Olmir's northern half is wilderness and small monsterous kingdoms, and its southern half is different city-states ruled by different core D&D races. They once were an alliance, called the Alliance of Olmir, but too many betrayals and feuds caused them to each become independent.

South of Olmir are the war-torn valleys where Blackforge lies. Inside a volcanic mountain a society of gnomes craft marvelous artifacts. They trade weapons to the dragon worshiping barbarian tribes of the sundered valleys in exchange for protection.

East of all that lies the mysterious kingdom of Voronthra and down under rests the Held Red Desert, said to be entirely held above ground by a titan. It's psychadelic and Dune-esque.

My newest adventure, which might become its own campaign, using Old School Essentials, takes place in the great western island Eeroncres. It's intentionally very classic fantasy but with post-apocalyptic, demonic undertones and some other fun things.

The Seer Islands is a huge . It deserves it's own post. Until not long ago it was blooming and tropical, now it is a decaying european-weather group of islands.

Adonis is a huge jungle and is the pulp-fantasy type place. I imagine adventures here are like an Indiana Jones movie with a lot to discover, ancient civilizations and beings and whatnot. Can easily be its own whole campaign but I plan to use it as a high-level zone. 

The antediluvian empire is like Atlantis but not lame.

The Uncontrollable Sorcerous Mouth of Inifred The Unforgetting

 You find a weird tome with an actual mouth on the cover.

The spine reads: The Uncontrollable Sorcerous Mouth of Inifred The Unforgetting. 

It holds an altered form of the Magic Mouth spell. The spell can be cast straight from the tome with a 50% chance of the tome becoming a blank book. When casting the Magic Mouth spell straight from this book or memorized out of this book, roll a d20 twice on the table to see which additional effects the spell has: 

1. Tries to bite anything coming near it, if successful it can instantly mutilate and bite off fingers or entire hands. this is usually a surprise attack with a +9 to hit.

2. By mimicking the lip-movement of magical incantations, meaning the casting of spells with a verbal component, the mouth casts another copy of the spell on the caster. This works 3 times per day.

3. Swallows any words uttered near it --the mouth opens and says the words "backwards" like a recording played backwards. This turns everyone's sentences to mere gasps. Multiple people speaking at the same time sounds like a chaotic mumble coming from the mouth.

4. Has large and pointy ears, can relay what is being said anywhere in the same building/vicinity of the mouth.

5. Can be fed to increase in size. If not fed meat for a month the mouth withers. after exactly a year the mouth will have already grown 10-ft in size and will become a dimensional gate to the original plane of the first thing it was fed.

6. Functions as a tiny pocket dimension to store things and will exclaim exactly what is currently inside of it every time.

7. Can mimic the sound of any animal perfectly as well as any voice it has heard speak

8. Demands a kiss, if denied the mouth will utter a curse on the creature (roll random curse). The mouth ends its curse by stating the conditions: it can lifted by by not speaking for a month or by priests at the Temple of the Sealed Lip.

9. Has an unbelievably long and sticky tongue and will try to lick anything colored green.

10. Transfers into any surface that is placed against it.

11. Spits a 5-ft big gelatinouos cube at the end of its sentences. 

12. Will name the location of anything after tasting a piece of it.

13. Laughs and mocks everyone passing next to it, forcing a Will save against 3d4 mental damage.

14. Will say the exact opposite of what it's supposed to say, literally has a snake tongue. 

15. From the moment it appears the mouth just makes a long Aaaaagh! scream

16. Relays the latest gossip from the 7th Layer of Hell every 2nd dawn. The lips are burning hot to the touch. 

17. Large lamprey mouth, cuts through flesh and then sucks out blood.

18.At exactly dawn it will speak out the exact details of casting a random spell. at the end of this explanation the spell goes off. This can be transcribed directly as a scroll.

19. Speaks in an ancient and forgotten form of Dwarvish.

20. Keeps breathing in and out, has bad breath.

The regular spell:

Magic MouthSpell 2

AuditoryIllusionVisual
Traditions arcaneoccult
Cast 2 action, somaticverbal
Range touch; Targets 1 creature or object
Duration unlimited
You specify a trigger and a message up to 25 words long. When the specified trigger occurs within 30 feet of the target, an illusory mouth appears on the target and speaks the message, and the magic mouth spell ends.